Day 7: My zodiac sign, and does it fit my personality?
My birthday is July 2, so I am firmly in the “Cancer” territory of the Zodiac. In short, hell yes it fits my personality.
Cancers are empaths, nurturers, caretakers. We are also ridiiiiculously sensitive (not always in a good way), intuitive, nearly “psychic.”
When I’m super “connected” to someone, weird things happen. I’ll dream of them after not seeing them for a while, to receive a text from them when I wake up. I’ll randomly feel a need to call someone who turns out to need me just then. Once, when I was sixteen, I woke up one morning and told my mom she had to call my Great Uncle Ben. It was a weird thing for me to say…but she hadn’t heard from him in a while, so she made the call. Turned out he was in the hospital; he’d had some kind of tumor in his stomach (he passed away shortly after). Yes, for the inquiring minds, my Ben is named after him. He was as close to a Grandfather as I ever had (another really long, sordid tale for another day…I’ve had a far different life than most assume), hence the deep “connection.”
Cancers are known to be creative (ahem), and sometimes need the grounding influence of more practical people. I say sometimes, because I don’t believe dream bubbles always need popping…sometimes they need tweaking, but not breaking. I, for sure, have my head in the clouds sometimes, but I’ve figured out that some “real time” hard work is the way to make my ideas come to life.
Our sensitivity makes us scared to open up, to connect, for fear of being judged, or hurt. I’ve been through a lot, at this point, and still, it’s not unheard of for me to get my stomach in a knot over a social interaction I think didn’t go well. It’s “normal” for me to “pull into my shell” when I’m feeling unsure of myself, or when I’m feeling overwhelmed. I consider myself outgoing (enough), but social interactions can tire me out (typical crab!). It didn’t used to be as tough, when I was younger, but a lot of “newer” social interactions now include explaining how I became a widow. I can absolutely talk about it, and I can do it without crying-I’m pretty used to it by now; but when I have to do it repeatedly over the course of a long stretch, it begins to wear me down. After an overnight school trip with my daughter recently, I literally needed to talk to no one for a solid two days, and spent one morning in bed, completely zoned out. I like to call these “emotional hangovers.” However, one way I’ve worked my way “around” this, is to immerse myself in them more often; kind of like building muscles over time. I still have plenty of times I’m hanging in my shell (happily), but those days have lessened the last few months.
We are tenacious, loyal, moody, and battle insecurity (check, check, check and check!).
I am a true water sign, with me feeling most myself, most zen, and even my most beautiful when I’m near the ocean. The sand and salt water call to me like the crab I am.